Here's a ridiculously sappy journal just in time for Valentine's Day. You are forewarned….

First of all let me say, I've been a little bit of a self involved single chick for quite some time now. However, over the past three months I have been dating someone who has made me reconsider my solo existence. This is the first time in ages that the words "monogamy" and "commitment" have passed through my head let alone my lips.

What does this have to do with Eric Kroll, you may ask? Well, let me share my story…

Before leaving for San Francisco, my new beau and I sat and poured over some of Eric's photographs. I had read somewhere that Eric likes to shoot his muse Gwen, with women who are completely different from her. Being that she is a short, skinny, blond woman and I am a curvy and spontaneous brunette, I thought - hey, who knows…maybe I'll let that little exhibitionist in me out of the closet.

I'm not sure what came over me but I heard myself saying to my new beau, "You know, there's a chance that Eric might ask to me to pose in his photographs…"

To which he responded, "So…do you want to do it?"

The bachelorette/feminist-with-an-attitude-problem in me responded, "Maybe".

After a long time watching his face contort as he assessed his feelings, he hesitantly said, "I think you should do whatever you want." To which he added, "But just out of curiosity, how would you feel if I modeled in pictures like these?"

My mind raced…. I'd be fine with it….wouldn't I? Of course I would…I'm cool like that. Hmmm….well….um…..all right then.

I'd like to say that this never came up again. However, less than a week later in San Francisco, Eric turned to me and said playfully, "Now it's time for Cynthia to take off her clothes…"

My reason for declining Eric's offer may have been because I'm not a huge fan of his most recent work. It also may have been because my poor mother has had enough stress in her life.

But the real reason is because…I'm in love. It's as plain and simple as that.

Cynthia Loyst
Segment Producer, SEXTV